Mistakes…. Mistakes… and Mistakes

Is it not true that we have learnt the best lessons of our life through the worst mistakes we committed?

How many times have we apologized to someone whom we thought is imperfect? Were we right in thinking so?

Have there not been situations in our life when we committed mistakes and refused to accept the same (till now)?

Are not mistakes proofs for the fact that we are really trying hard to evolve?

Life is full of questions and most of them hover around others. As humans, we consider our mistakes as valuable experiences. When it comes to others, we attribute their inexperience as the reasons for their mistakes. Why is it that we are absolutely comfortable finding mistakes in others but refuse to accept the ones we commit? If this is what we are good at, does it have something to do with our own character or others’?

Don’t criticize what you can’t understand

Some of us are in the habit of finding fault with others all round the clock. Irrespective of the place we are in, we are continuously on the lookout for mistakes others commit. We keep criticizing whatever others do using our own judgment. The internal garbage we carry inside us disallows us to enjoy the fragrance emitted by others. When we tend to be opinionated we remain least informed. This makes us an object of mockery and our criticisms reach the gutters.

It is human tendency to get into an insecurity mode when we do not understand something. We feel unsafe due to lack of information. The person on the other side becomes our threat since we fail to understand something about them. We look at everything the person does with suspicion. Deep inside, the green eyed monster in each one of us tries to compare our ‘self’ and situations with that of the other person. When the person concerned is a step above us, we tend to attribute their vices for who they are today. When the person concerned is a step below us, we tend to attribute their weaknesses for who they are today. Ironically, both these judgments we make are only our perceptions and need not be the reality. Such perceptions that we create in a secret manner inside us gives us the satisfaction that we know everything about the person whom we are commenting about. We experience the feeling of safety such self caused perceptions offer.

Till we stop criticizing what we really can’t understand, we continue to talk ill of others. We keep finding mistakes in others not realizing what we are doing is a mistake by itself. 

Don’t judge anyone’s story by the chapter you walked in

All of us live our own life from the time we are born till the time we die. No one else knows everything about us. Many internal things we feel or experience is known only to us in the truest sense of the same. When we die, not only our physical body but those secrets that only we knew will perish with us. These secrets may be something to do with the crush we had on someone. These secrets may be related to our health or financial issues that we did not want to share with anyone. The secrets we tend to hide may be related to the mistakes we committed intentionally to satisfy the green eyed monster in us. These secrets may pertain to the mistakes we committed unintentionally but hidden from the public eyes to safeguard our image.

Irrespective of their nature and causes, secrets are secrets. If we accept the above, then the irony is it is the same with others too. Others live their own life and have secrets to hide. Others commit mistakes intentionally and unintentionally. Others experience pains and wounds silently not wanting to confide in any of us. If we have the right to do all the above, so do others.

Life is nothing but a book of reality. Each chapter we experience is different from that of others. Every chapter is unique adorned by people who are different in every way. We live every chapter of our life experiencing the same in all its originality. Not all whom we consider close are present in all chapters of our life. Not all of us can be present in all chapters of everyone’s life. All of us play a role in each other’s life only in select chapters. In which case, is it fair on our part to judge someone based on the chapter we walked in? If we come to a conclusion about them by means of generalization or a past experience, are we labeling them or ourselves?

Change your ‘self’. You can’t change the scene

Every person has a story to say. Every human being is the hero of his own story. No human being in this planet experiences what you are going through. You can’t experience everything that others around you do. When we hear other people criticizing us, we feel angry that they don’t know what we have experienced in life which has made us do what we did today. Is it not the same with others too? Understand that they too have paid the price all through their life to reach the destination they are in today. 

Criticizing is one of the best entertainments that humans enjoy in a seamless manner. Human mind enjoys listening to gossip. Humans love to backbite. When we gossip and back bite we still remain humans but with an inhumane approach.

Every human being is fighting his own battles in life. It is improper to criticize someone with the very limited knowledge we have about them or the situations they are in. Remember, we criticize someone because they are doing something. In the same wavelength, we criticize someone because we have nothing else to do.

Creating something that others criticize is better than criticizing others who are involved in creating something. The former helps us to evolve. The latter pushes us into the gutter. It is our choice to evolve, learning from our mistakes or to remain immersed in the gutter blaming others.