Excuses – Our deliberate attempts to fail

Are we the real 'we' during all situations we experience in our life? If yes, why do we have grouses? If no, what makes us project ourselves as a different personality hiding the real ‘us’?

Do we really enjoy the concocted image we create about ourselves time and again to suit the demands of our environment? If no, why are we not deciding to live our life to the truest of its essence?

We come across many who are in the habit of giving excuses all the time to safeguard themselves from the damages that reality can cause? Why do they never face the reality instead of giving excuses?

Are we not creating an illusionary world around us every time we give an excuse for what we do or say?

Are not excuses just pain killers that help us mask our pain rather than ridding us of the same in a perpetual manner?

Life is full of contradictions. We tend to feel we are a confident a person and yet fear the known, unknown and every other thing. In order to safeguard the image we have created among others about the ‘confident us’, we move out of our real personality. We do things that are not really ‘us’. This is when we start talking untrue and concocted stories about ourselves. When we continue to do things that are out of our character, we feel uncertain and the feeling causes fear in us. This fear can be about anything right from failure to embarrassment. We start giving excuses proactively allowing negativity to embrace us forever.

 

We are the victim of our excuses

When we make excuses, no one is concerned with the same but only us. We generate excuses when we are unable to do something. Excuses, per se, make us witnesses to our own incapability. By giving excuses we will never be able to escape from our foes since however they will not believe them. Our friends don’t deserve to be lied. So, who are these excuses for? Are we gaining out of giving excuses or are we digging our own grave to bury ourselves soon? Is it not true that by making excuses, we are acknowledging our inefficiency? If so, instead of working on our efficiency levels, why do we decide to rust further?

  

Life makes us travel through situations offering us the choice to succeed or fail. When we succeed, we attribute many factors as reasons for the success. When we fail, we put forth the same reasons as excuses to safeguard our image and veil our inability. So what typically are reasons and excuses? Is there any difference at all between the terminologies? Let us see this through an example.

Ask a child why he scored low marks in an exam.

a) He will blame his teacher for not correcting the paper properly.

b) He will blame his school for not completing the syllabus early
c) He will blame the people who set the question paper for having asked out of syllabus 
    questions.

d)  He will blame the exam supervisor for collecting the answer sheets early.

All the above are excuses.

The only reason and the real one why he scored low marks is – he has not studied well.

This is typically the difference between a reason and an excuse.

At the far end of life…..

When you want to do something you will do it. When you do not have the will to do it, you will search for excuses. Excuses are nothing but a mask for your inability. It is the ugly face of negative thinking that hides itself behind the mask. You may feel safe hiding your weaknesses behind this mask. The constant safe feeling you enjoy behind the mask will soon make you an ‘Excuse Executive’.

At the far end of the journey when your turn back to look at the life you have lived, you will see nothing but an ocean of excuses. You would see the image of an entity which is covered with failure that its pessimistic outlook caused all through its life. The self limiting beliefs and bad judgments would have immersed the image with just one factor called Failure.

Avoid being an ‘Excuse Executive’

Stop blaming lack of money or time for your failure. Stop attributing your age and ignorance for your lagging behind. Get out of the self limiting beliefs that chain you all through your life. Pull yourself out of the fears that failure, responsibility, embarrassment, mistakes, change and uncertainty cause in you.

When we foster fear, we remain entrapped in our comfort zone. Don’t keep searching for inspiration externally since the search may soon make you feel exhausted. Everything that is outside is very much inside you. Remember, excuses drown you and excellence makes you taste success. Being an ‘Excuse Executive’ or a ‘matter of excellence’ is up to you. You choose to be who you are.